I've known for a long time that I love spending time with people. That the most mundane activities can become the highlight of my day when shared with someone I enjoy being around. I just wasn't quite aware how vital quality time (and quality conversations) were to my sanity.
Dr. Chapman uses the metaphor of a "love tank" to illustrate how one feels at a particular time. If your love tank is empty it can radically affect your entire outlook and happiness.
I don't like to admit it but I struggled with a hefty amount of culture shock a few months after coming here but I think I've stumbled upon the source of the difficulties. The other Americans here were often busy and I rarely saw them, but my Chinese friendships were still too new to be deep--and growth hindered by cultural/communicative differences made them develop slowly. I almost never got the chance to sit down and have a conversation more meaningful than, "Are you used to the climate here?" or, "Do you want a Chinese boyfriend?" It felt like I was missing some part of my heart I didn't even know I needed.
Thankfully after five or six months I did develop some close friendships which have meant the world to me. And more of them are feeling natural every day. I have a lot to be thankful for.
"If someone thinks that love and peace is a cliche that must have been left behind in the Sixties, that's his problem. Love and peace are eternal."
-John Lennon
2 comments:
hmmm maybe I should read that. I'm not sure what language I speak.
You and I are similar in that respect. I struggle here not having close friends and meaningful conversation. It creates an undue struggle to not rely on my teens to fill that in my life. I think that's why I read more now than ever in my life because it's kinda like having a deep conversation. :/
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